A friend wrote this post. It is one of the reasons that I've created an opt-in group for my political posts.
"THINGS TO REMEMBER WHEN ARGUING ABOUT POLITICS ON FACEBOOK
1. Remember that you are wrong about some of your beliefs. You don't know *which* beliefs, or else you wouldn't believe them, but nobody's perfect. (And if you think you are perfect and everything you believe is correct, that demonstrates an arrogance and closed-mindedness that means you're probably wrong about a lot of things.) So no matter how infuriating you find someone else's political position, have compassion for him being wrong because you're wrong about things as well. And you might be the one who's wrong about that particular issue, though of course you don't think that's the case. (I'm certain to be wrong about some of my beliefs too, which is why I try to have tolerance for differing points of view.)
2. Saying "I don't understand how an decent and intelligent person could disagree with me" is not proof that those who disagree are stupid and evil. It is a confession of ignorance. If you can't give the real reasons that people disagree with you, and have to fall back on insisting it's because they're stupid and evil, then you don't understand the issue. Of course even if you understand their reasons, you'll think they're wrong, which is why you disagree with them. But if you can't state the opposing position and reasons for it clearly enough that someone on the other side thinks you are giving a fair summary, than you don't know enough to be arguing about it. (What are you even arguing against?) And this extends to being able to explain why someone on the other side who can fairly summarize your position would be able to say that your reasons for believing your position are mistaken.
3. You will never change someone's mind by arguing with them. It doesn't matter if your argument is a good one or a bad one. If it's a bad argument, the person you're arguing with will just think you're an obnoxious jerk. If it's a good argument that proves they're completely wrong, then they'll go into denial to avoid feeling like a fool. Either way, your argument will leave them opposing you and believing their contrary opinion even harder.
4. You cannot tell whether the argument you're making is a good one or a bad one. Neither can anyone who agrees with you. Of course you think all the arguments you're making, and all the arguments the people on your side are making, are good ones. Everyone thinks this about themselves/their side. The other side thinks all their arguments are good too.
5. Your arguments are not convincing neutral parties either. Since you can't tell if your arguments are good or bad, you may be making bad arguments, which are only convincing neutral parties that you/your side are jerks. But even good arguments aren't convincing neutral parties. Neutral parties are just getting annoyed with your constant vitriolic posts and ignoring or unfollowing you.
6. If you want to convince neutral parties, pick your battles. Limit your political posts so that when you do post something about politics, people pay attention. Don't pile on to the same issues that everyone else is already posting about. Don't post expressing your anger, but think about how you can be persuasive to someone who isn't already as angry as you are. (And no, explaining to them why they should be angry isn't the right way to go about this.) Address the real reasons for believing the opposing point of view, and clearly and logically explain why they are wrong, rather than trying to insult them away. Make people feel smart for agreeing with you.
If you do this infrequently enough, you'll end up persuading people to join your cause, which is what you want.
7. Destroying friendships over political arguments is a terrible thing to do. You're removing all of the value that friend brought to your life over something that isn't really going to make a difference. (Their one vote is incredibly unlikely to change things.) And you're actively pushing them to vote against you anyway. In ruining the friendship over that one issue, you lose the opportunity to influence them on every other issue. You cause a schism that tears apart lots of other friends. It's just all bad with absolutely no upside. And if you're tempted to say, "Well I don't want to be friends with someone who believes [X]," remember the points above. Everyone is wrong about some things, including you, so you should have tolerance for people being wrong. You might be the one who is wrong. If you can't figure out the reason for your friend disagreeing and can only conclude that he/she is evil, then you don't understand the issue, and you shouldn't punish your friends/ruin friendships over your own lack of understanding.
8. If you see something political that you vehemently disagree with, or find yourself in an argument on Facebook, there are some healthy ways to deal with it: You can ignore it, or roll your eyes and move on with your life. You could say, "Things are getting heated. Let's back off and agree to disagree." You could just stop responding. If you don't understand the reasons behind a belief, you could exercise your curiosity and try to learn more instead of reflexively fighting against it. Or if you really hate seeing those views, you can snooze or unfollow the person.
9. If you feel like you need to vent, rant, share angry memes with your like-minded friends, etc., that's okay. Just set up a filter so this sort of content is only going to the people who want to see it. Then you can post this content as much as you want without hurting your cause.
Just to be clear, your Facebook page is your own. It's not my place to tell you what to do with it. These are merely suggestions.
If you think arguing and insulting people with different beliefs is fun, and don't care that your hatred actively harms the causes you claim to be fighting for, then go right ahead. It's your choice what to write and none of my business.
However, if you want to stop harming the values you believe in, I recommend you keep these ideas in mind when you post about politics going forward."
"THINGS TO REMEMBER WHEN ARGUING ABOUT POLITICS ON FACEBOOK
1. Remember that you are wrong about some of your beliefs. You don't know *which* beliefs, or else you wouldn't believe them, but nobody's perfect. (And if you think you are perfect and everything you believe is correct, that demonstrates an arrogance and closed-mindedness that means you're probably wrong about a lot of things.) So no matter how infuriating you find someone else's political position, have compassion for him being wrong because you're wrong about things as well. And you might be the one who's wrong about that particular issue, though of course you don't think that's the case. (I'm certain to be wrong about some of my beliefs too, which is why I try to have tolerance for differing points of view.)
2. Saying "I don't understand how an decent and intelligent person could disagree with me" is not proof that those who disagree are stupid and evil. It is a confession of ignorance. If you can't give the real reasons that people disagree with you, and have to fall back on insisting it's because they're stupid and evil, then you don't understand the issue. Of course even if you understand their reasons, you'll think they're wrong, which is why you disagree with them. But if you can't state the opposing position and reasons for it clearly enough that someone on the other side thinks you are giving a fair summary, than you don't know enough to be arguing about it. (What are you even arguing against?) And this extends to being able to explain why someone on the other side who can fairly summarize your position would be able to say that your reasons for believing your position are mistaken.
3. You will never change someone's mind by arguing with them. It doesn't matter if your argument is a good one or a bad one. If it's a bad argument, the person you're arguing with will just think you're an obnoxious jerk. If it's a good argument that proves they're completely wrong, then they'll go into denial to avoid feeling like a fool. Either way, your argument will leave them opposing you and believing their contrary opinion even harder.
4. You cannot tell whether the argument you're making is a good one or a bad one. Neither can anyone who agrees with you. Of course you think all the arguments you're making, and all the arguments the people on your side are making, are good ones. Everyone thinks this about themselves/their side. The other side thinks all their arguments are good too.
5. Your arguments are not convincing neutral parties either. Since you can't tell if your arguments are good or bad, you may be making bad arguments, which are only convincing neutral parties that you/your side are jerks. But even good arguments aren't convincing neutral parties. Neutral parties are just getting annoyed with your constant vitriolic posts and ignoring or unfollowing you.
6. If you want to convince neutral parties, pick your battles. Limit your political posts so that when you do post something about politics, people pay attention. Don't pile on to the same issues that everyone else is already posting about. Don't post expressing your anger, but think about how you can be persuasive to someone who isn't already as angry as you are. (And no, explaining to them why they should be angry isn't the right way to go about this.) Address the real reasons for believing the opposing point of view, and clearly and logically explain why they are wrong, rather than trying to insult them away. Make people feel smart for agreeing with you.
If you do this infrequently enough, you'll end up persuading people to join your cause, which is what you want.
7. Destroying friendships over political arguments is a terrible thing to do. You're removing all of the value that friend brought to your life over something that isn't really going to make a difference. (Their one vote is incredibly unlikely to change things.) And you're actively pushing them to vote against you anyway. In ruining the friendship over that one issue, you lose the opportunity to influence them on every other issue. You cause a schism that tears apart lots of other friends. It's just all bad with absolutely no upside. And if you're tempted to say, "Well I don't want to be friends with someone who believes [X]," remember the points above. Everyone is wrong about some things, including you, so you should have tolerance for people being wrong. You might be the one who is wrong. If you can't figure out the reason for your friend disagreeing and can only conclude that he/she is evil, then you don't understand the issue, and you shouldn't punish your friends/ruin friendships over your own lack of understanding.
8. If you see something political that you vehemently disagree with, or find yourself in an argument on Facebook, there are some healthy ways to deal with it: You can ignore it, or roll your eyes and move on with your life. You could say, "Things are getting heated. Let's back off and agree to disagree." You could just stop responding. If you don't understand the reasons behind a belief, you could exercise your curiosity and try to learn more instead of reflexively fighting against it. Or if you really hate seeing those views, you can snooze or unfollow the person.
9. If you feel like you need to vent, rant, share angry memes with your like-minded friends, etc., that's okay. Just set up a filter so this sort of content is only going to the people who want to see it. Then you can post this content as much as you want without hurting your cause.
Just to be clear, your Facebook page is your own. It's not my place to tell you what to do with it. These are merely suggestions.
If you think arguing and insulting people with different beliefs is fun, and don't care that your hatred actively harms the causes you claim to be fighting for, then go right ahead. It's your choice what to write and none of my business.
However, if you want to stop harming the values you believe in, I recommend you keep these ideas in mind when you post about politics going forward."